


Tiny and The Beast

by crazyparakiss



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Crack Fic, Hogwarts Era, Implied Broom/Mystery Anus, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Other, teeny-weeny-peen fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-09
Updated: 2015-01-09
Packaged: 2018-03-06 20:57:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3148319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crazyparakiss/pseuds/crazyparakiss
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They have a similar problem; one is big and one is small.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tiny and The Beast

**Author's Note:**

> Written September of 2010. Not beta'd.
> 
> Even now I have no regrets.

If surveyed a large number of the Hogwarts populace would agree on one thing; Draco Malfoy had it all and was a lucky bastard. The blond arse would admit it himself, if asked, with an air of indifference, to his near equals, or with a sneer for those way below his station (like Weasel).   
  
Yet, to himself he could not lie. Money, looks, money, charm, money, and good breeding could only get one so far, and _money,_ of course. However, a perfectly proportioned body, a vault or twelve full of gold, and all the other fine things in his life could not make up for his short comings. His  _very_  short comings all three and a quarter (which he liked to call a half) inches of flesh that mocked him from between his thighs; nestled in a neat patch of dark gold curls. The Italian winery villa, the French chateau, the twelve plus vaults of gold, the blemish free face and neat even teeth, the fine breeding, and all the connections in the world were worthless if they couldn’t make his cock marvelous and large; like Zabini’s or- fuck it- even Crabbe’s! No, the universe decided, long ago, that no one could have it all, and screwed Draco when he dove from his mother’s womb to bless the world with his presence.   
  
Seventeen; a shitty age for any adolescent, but truly horrifying for a tiny dick owning boy who’d love life a whole lot more if he could find someone to take a ride on the blasted thing. Yes seventeen a shitty age for anyone, but even worse for a virgin with no hopes of getting laid without being laughed at.   
  
“Fuck my life,” Draco groaned after yet another game where Potter, The Boy Who Could Not Lose, beat Draco to the snitch. Potter who he watched as the groupies swarmed him while he sheepishly scratched the back of his neck, having the audacity to look bashful. “Prick,” he sneered as he diddled about the pitch while he waited for his teammates to exit the community showers. He had no desire to dance with the possibility of expulsion for Obliviating some idiot for discovering his weak point. No, Draco was perfectly fine with waiting until the big cocked bastards had left the showers and left to brood in the privacy of the common room.   
  
Forty minutes past the game Draco made his way into the lockers; no sounds and no voices, just the way he liked things. He wasted no time kicking off the clothes that felt grimy and clung to his sweat soaked skin. A contented sigh escaped him as he stepped beneath the automatic spray. The heat forced the ache of his muscles away while the water washed away the stink of hard play that only resulted in yet another loss. “Fucking Potter,” he muttered.   
  
Soon he was too occupied with scrubbing down his body and hair that he didn’t dwell on thoughts of Potter or the boys with bigger pricks than his own. No, he was more content with humming a merry tune he’d heard on the wireless a few weeks before; one of those jaunty numbers by the Weird Sisters. Damn thing just wouldn’t leave his head, and as no one was around he began humming louder. Singing “Something! Something.. something, love, something. Something, need it bad.” If surveyed the entire populace of Hogwarts would agree that Draco Malfoy would never be caught humming and singing the word “Something,” instead of the actual lyrics. In fact, the great Draco himself would incinerate one with a death glare if asked about such an inconceivable act. Even more likely the young man would deny it until he went, with an ostentatious flare, to his grave.   
  
However, he couldn’t deny it if someone saw it; a someone with a better, more reputable, record of not lying. A someone like Harry Potter, Boy Who Lived To Make Things Unbearable For All Malfoys In Existence. Or if, like Draco, one found that a mouth full; Scarhead aka Potty Saint Potter. Who, at that such time, happened to be in the wide entrance of the community showers. Mouth agape, in a rather unrefined manner, Draco would recall later, and looking like a giant dunderhead Potter shook himself before he said, “Malfoy.” His tone incredulous, as if he felt his terrible eyes were lying to him.   
  
“Potter!” Draco spun around so quickly he nearly slipped on the tiles, but he didn’t care about that; only about the  _small_  problem. He needn’t have worried, Potter was too busy gaping at his face to look anywhere below his chest line. Draco however was not as stunned and let his eyes drop. The logical thought in his mind was,  **If mine is small then Potter’s has to be downright minuscule; the universe had to balance out that mother fucker’s luck-**  With thinned lips he stared at the injustice of it all; Potter who had money, more fame, more followers, a tan, and broader muscles...that Potter, the lucky bastard, had a beast of a cock. Thick, with velvety looking skin, and proud veins that no doubt helped it grow to porn star lengths. He couldn’t help it, as Draco stared and stared and stared he laughed and laughed and bawled, “You fucking BASTARD,” he shouted as he launched himself at Potter. Angry, as he felt was justified, because it seemed that Harry blasted Potter had it all!   
  
“I know we beat you Malfoy but you’ve really got to calm down,” Potter said in an infuriatingly calm tone, once his large mouth snapped shut.   
  
Draco boiled further at his words. “Why can’t I ever win,” he screamed as his fingers pulled at his wet, matted hair.   
  
Potter, the insufferable git, gave him a very blank stare as he sarcastically replied, “A bit of practise couldn’t hurt.”   
  
He was still on the subject of _Quidditch_ while Draco had moved on to the important topic of _cock size_. However, Potter with his perfectly shaped cock and great abs didn’t even bother to so much as glance at Draco’s bits. What a prat! Since he was a god in all things Potter apparently felt that he could ignore Draco’s bits because his were so fucking fantastic! Well as if Draco would let him ignore them! Later he would look back at this irrational thought process and further beat himself for his stupidity, but at that moment he was too damned angry to rationalise.   
  
“Potter!” He raged as he invaded personal space while the other young man was washing his face with broad tan hands. “Fucking look at another bloke’s bits when you are showering with him! That’s the proper way.”   
  
Potter sputtered through the spray of water, and turned his face towards Draco, water dripped off his black lashes, that clung together, and down the wide contours of his face. “What the fuck, Malfoy?” His offence mingled with nervous laughter, and true to Potter form he tried to down play it, which only caused Draco to be more irritated. “All right, Malfoy Ha. Ha. I get it; you want me to cower in the face of your enormous cock and say something along the lines of  _Oh I wish mine were that big_.” Without a missed beat he rolled his eyes and simpered, “Ooo Ahh, Malfoy I bow before your godly package. Please let me, the unworthy mortal, gaze upon its awesomeness and weep in envy.”   
  
Potter looked surprised when Draco shoved him into the tiled wall roughly, “Fuck you Potter, just cause you have a monster cock doesn’t mean you can make fun of me!” 

Potter’s lips curled around a sneer, “What the hell would you know!”   
  
“Enough to know that that they don’t make them bigger than yours or they’d kill people,” Draco raged, his flinty eyes wild.   
  
Potter spat on him, and oh did that rile him up, “Leave my cock out of this!”   
  
“Why it’s freakishly huge-,”   
  
“I know!” Somehow Potter switched their positions and slammed Draco into the hard, chilly wall. “Sorry my cock is so large it’s offensive! I didn’t think anyone would be here to see the damn thing!” His face came obnoxiously close to Draco’s own, he could smell the soap on Potter’s stubbled jaw, “I get tired of all the comments about it, so could you just pretend it isn’t there?!”  
  
Draco generally possessed common sense but in that moment it flew towards the southern hemisphere for a holiday. “Potter, if an elephant is standing in the room it is hard for a person to ignore it.”   
  
Potter bared his teeth and the barbarian hissed before he looked to Draco’s own cock. A malicious smile took over his face and with a saccharine tone he said, “At least people can see an elephant, an inch worm is rather hard to spot.”   
  
Draco kicked against him, “You take that back you freakish...freak!”  
  
“Your silver tongue is a bit tarnished, Malfoy.” The smirk Potter wore looked wrong and Draco sneered.   
  
“Fuck you, Potter,” he spat.   
  
But there was an awkward gleam in Potter’s obnoxiously green eyes, and the brute tutted at Draco! Tutted! Just as he pressed himself closer and whispered words that made Draco shiver in fear, he’d never admit there was a thrill of anticipation as well. Not until later, much later. “No, Malfoy, fuck you.” A purr passed Potter’s thin lips, “Oh yes fuck you and your tight arse.”   
  
Lips crashed against his and Draco struggled for air. The spray of continuously hot water made steam that coupled with Potter’s brutal kiss hindered breathing. His knees buckled when Potter’s tongue forced its way into his gasping mouth. Potter got lucky and stayed the dominator of the kiss while Draco shook, shocked, from the vigour of Potter’s passion. Broad calloused hands ran over his cheeks, down the column of his throat, and across the angle of his shoulders before they traced the taut line of muscle along his chest and abdomen. Had he been in his right mind Draco would have shoved him, but his right mind went mental and he moaned instead. Arched, purred, and did a number of unsavoury things that no one in the whole of Hogwarts would have believed.   
  
When Potter opened Draco’s thighs wide, with his own muscled thighs, rational thought tried to take the reins. However, when Potter’s stone hard beast of a cock came into contact with his straining little worm, Draco’s rational melted and ran with haste to his bollocks. Potter rutted against him, “Oh fuck,” he chanted, over and over against Draco’s throat. His breath was warm, but cooled the heated water that ran against Draco’s neck. Again he shivered; later he’d deny it was Potter’s words and say that it was the cold.   
  
The tan chest pulled away from Draco’s own when Potter decided to look down at the dark purpled cocks between them. His right hand went to rub at them and Draco’s eyes rolled as he hissed, “Potter.” He didn’t hear the chuckle, too caught up in the sounds of water that hit the floor and the feel of it as it slithered between them while it mingled with his pants. Potter’s left hand slid behind Draco. It snaked its way down his lower back before it wiggled a finger into his crack. When it swirled the entrance of his body Draco threw his head back, ignored the burst of pain in his cranium, and begged. Draco Malfoy begged Harry Potter like a bitch in heat.   
  
“Fuck, Potter, don’t tease it! Put your fingers in! Ple-ase!” He whined and moaned and rutted; his need destroyed the last of his dignity.   
  
Later, hours upon hours, when the sun had been in bed for sometime Draco sat with a pruned body under the shower heads. His eyes didn’t meet Potter’s and he tried not to think about what they had done, over and over and over. He’d never look at Potter’s broom handle the same he decided as he stared blankly at the wet handle that sat less than a foot away. He’d also never look at Weasel the same way; that bugger was fucking perverted. The bottles of different lubes, both the kinds for a vaginal canal and an anal one. When Potter had grabbed them from behind a loose stone in the wall Draco gave him an admittedly glazed but questioning glance, and all he did was shrug and say, “Thank Ron.” It had almost killed his erection; but the damn thing demanded Potter. Demanded his mouth, hole, hand and any other part of him the little thing could reach. Just as sure as his mouth, hole, hand, and body, in general, sung with the need of Potter’s cock.   
  
But in the aftermath of a chaos, that was probably a long time coming, Draco just sat shocked and in denial of what had happened. And Potter, the idiot, had to go and ruin his denial.   
  
“That was pleasant,” he commented with a lewd chuckle, “I never knew you had any uses other than being a complete prat and a waste of space.”   
  
“Shut the fuck up, Potter,” he raved and turned, a twinge of pain shot up his back but he ignored it in favour of his fist that connected with Potter’s jaw. “I was obviously tricked!” 

Potter spat, blood that tinged the water that swirled the drain, and wiped his jaw. “Yeah, you seemed really fooled while you begged for my fingers.”   
  
“Fuck you, Potter,” he snarled as he got to his feet.   
  
“Same time next week, Malfoy,” Potter called out as he left in a huff.   
  
“You wish,” he shouted back, but his denial was still kicked into to full gear.

 

The next week he showed up and Potter smirked knowingly, bleeding prat.

  
_End_


End file.
